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Oh, excellent. Hopefully the giant peacock statue arrived unharmed.

[Joking, he's joking.]

I could tell you, and make you struggle with it all yourself
I could also just come show you and possibly maybe lend a hand.

Oh, I sent that one on to your place. Consider it your tip.

[ He hasn't gotten over his snit, but he's at least capable of taking a joke and responding in kind. And he has to admit that putting this bed together is probably never going to happen if it's left to him alone. ]

You'd better come over. I'd hate to ruin whatever feng shui you have in mind.

That's perfect actually, I secretly bought it for myself on your dime.

I can be there in two shakes. Do you drink beer? It's not quite the same here as on Earth but it's pretty good anyway.

Occasionally. If you want to bring some over, you can.

[ but he's not going to be tricked into liking you, rose!!! ]

Great. See you soon.

[that sounds like a CHALLENGE.

David turns up an hour later, sunglasses over his eyes, and when the door opens he holds up a six-pack in one hand.]

Feng Shui master at your service.

[ The Mulder that greets him would probably look sullen by Scully standards and generally Mulderish by everyone else's. No longer a fox, now just a Fox, wearing a mock turtleneck and jeans like he walked out of 1996. Which he did. ]

Come in.

[ Not quite cold, but not exactly a warm welcome, either. This is something he wants to get over with. ]

So what goes where?

[David blinks a few times, because he was still expecting fox!Fox, and it takes him a moment to connect this man to the one he'd met before. Then he splits into a grin, because he correctly guessed that Fox Mulder is hot.]

Hi.

[He follows him in, shuts the door behind himself, and fishes a notebook from the carryall slung over his arm. This he waves in the air as he strides to the center of Mulder's package-riddled apartment.]

I've got a floor plan in here. Looks like everything survived delivery. I was worried about the coffee table.

[ Rose, meanwhile, apparently has those eyebrows out of transformation, too. Interesting. Some part of Mulder is incredibly pleased to see that he's taller than the guy; it's a thought he's choosing not to interrogate. ]

Why? Is it glass?

[ How chic is this apartment going to be. ]

[Oh, yes, the eyebrows are part of the package. David sets his six-pack down atop a crate and begins flipping through his notebook, his answer distracted.]

Mmm. Partly.

[He finds the pages dedicated to the layout of Mulder's apartment and traces a finger over the page.]

Right. So I think the bed is a smart place to start, that's taking up most of the space at the moment. [He shoots a grin at Mulder, knowing, as he starts to pull layers of plastic wrap and protective foam padding away from one of the largest pieces.] I think you're gonna like this.

Huh.

[ He's from the 90s, he can appreciate a glass-topped coffee table's aesthetic value. Looks like this apartment's going to be a little less rough-edged than the one he left behind in Alexandria - at least until he starts covering it with newspaper clippings.

The face he gives Rose at the mention of the bed is blandly tolerant. He might be hot, but he doesn't emote all that much with people he doesn't know well. Reaching to help with the plastic - ]

Paint me a picture with words.

[Oh, just you wait, Mulder! David huffs a laugh, still unwrapping. Bit by bit, a buttery-tan leather material becomes apparent.]

Okay, so, it's actually more of a daybed than a bed-bed. Buffalo leather, with a convertible back, so it can be either a sofa or a very comfortable, supportive full-sized bed.

[He did his ✨research✨.]

[ To his surprise - and consternation - he does, in fact, like this bed. Sofa. Whatever. It looks like something out of his childhood, by way of the TV: the kind of furniture people far more sophisticated than his parents lived among. More importantly, it looks a hell of a lot more comfortable than the floor. ]

You've been talking to Scully, huh?

[ As he runs a hand along the leather, some appreciation in his eyes. No one else would advise a sofa-cum-bed for him. ]

[David looks far too pleased with himself as he detaches the hardware from the mattress in its little plastic wrapped bundle.]

Mmm, I may have picked her brain a little. [It was...enlightening.

David's brows raise expectantly.] Ready to move this?

Yeah.

[ Mulder gets on his end of the mattress, ready to lift it up. The inevitable questions swirling around his head - what'd you say to Scully, what'd she say, just what kind of damage control do I need to do - can at least wait until after this moment. ]

You want it up against a wall, or - ?

[He's halfway bent to pick up the other end of the daybed when Mulder says something that sounds very fucking dirty to David's slutty ears. He actually stops, straightens, presses his lips together and looks toward the ceiling while he talks himself out of saying something salacious.]

Mmm. Yep. Yes. There's a...side table. End table. Thing. Somewhere in all this. For next to the bed.

[He's shutting up now, and he's picking the fucking thing up so he has an excuse to stop talking and direct Mulder toward the bedroom instead.]

[ He watches Rose's reaction, and somewhere behind that mild interest that his face normally wears, he's laughing. The most that shows on the outside is his brows going up - Mulder hadn't expected something inadvertently off-color to get such a reaction.

It's a dangerous thing to reveal, truth be told, but for the moment, he's busy hefting up half a day bed. On the way into the bedroom - it, too, with more than a few boxes and shrink-wrapped objects Mulder hasn't explored - he adds ]

Don't tell me you thought I meant you.

[ If the buffalo leather gets scuffed in the pursuit of fucking with someone he's decided he doesn't like, so be it. ]

[David scoffs, nearly dropping one corner of the bed but managing to hang on, his jaw clenching with the effort and with his irritation at being called out like that.]

Um, no, I'm a professional, so. Lift up the right side as we go through the door.

[Ugh.]

Sure you are.

[ With a little snort. Only one of them's been startled by any of this.

He does what he's told, though, turning the mattress slightly in hopes of getting it to fit. ]

Scully help you with any of the rest of the furniture? Or just the bed?

[he hates you]

No, unfortunately we didn't spend the entire conversation theorizing about your furniture preferences. [He knows what you're getting at and he is choosing not to acknowledge that fact. The bed fits through the door, but just barely.]

Okay, now your end will go in the corner there...

[Ugh, this thing is heavy. He's not looking forward to the sitting room couch.]

Must've been a boring conversation, then.

[ He's this close to asking so what'd you talk about? - but he's put off, just barely, by the need to set the mattress down. It's pretty effortless for him, heavy but not too tough for a big conspiracy jock.

Disgusting, really. ]

So now that we got your end where you want it...

Oh, no, it's never boring. [David sets his end down, a smirk playing around his mouth as he straightens.]

We need to put the legs on. Think you can handle tightening a few bolts?

Give me a wrench long enough, and I shall bolt together the world.

[ With no apologies to Archimedes, not least because something about that look on Rose's face puts a bitter taste in his mouth.

And once he's settled in with the necessary hardware, with the tone of someone asking about the weather: ]

So what else have you been doing lately? Besides my partner.

So capable, [David teases, and sets about bringing in the side table while Mulder sets about putting the legs on the bed. He positions it out of the way for the time being and sets about removing the foam and plastic protecting the corners.

There's a notable pause as Mulder very conversationally asks a very pointed question, and then he continues, easy as anything.]

Mm, pretty busy running my store, actually. Spending time with my boyfriend. Why, are you jealous?

[ Mulder laughs, like that's an absurd question and not the obvious response to a man who cannot leave the subject of Scully's sex life alone. ]

Why would I be jealous?

[ This, naturally, is rhetorical. ]

Who's your boyfriend? Maybe I've met him.

Right, of course. She's your platonic work partner and you clearly are very normal about her.

[David looks completely unruffled by the insinuation about his boyfriend.]

Mmm, probably. He's very promiscuous. His name's Wade, he dresses like a giant red-and-black leather condom?

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